


Sixth Year: In Touch

by Forgetticus



Series: Alignment [7]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Begging, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, First Love, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Gay Sex, Hurt Remus Lupin, Hurt/Comfort, Intimacy, M/M, Making Love, Making Out, Marauders, Neck Kissing, POV Sirius Black, Rimming, Smut, Top Sirius Black
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-10
Updated: 2017-10-10
Packaged: 2019-01-15 12:49:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12321414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Forgetticus/pseuds/Forgetticus
Summary: This is part of a collection of separate drabble stories that document the life and times of Moony, Padfoot, Wormtail and Prongs.After everything that happened with Snape, Sirius goes to Remus and attempts a heart felt apology.'There was something paralyzing about having Remus completely naked in right front of him, as though time itself slowed for the sole purpose of paying reverence to the display.'





	Sixth Year: In Touch

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bottseveryflavorbeans_jrayoh23](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bottseveryflavorbeans_jrayoh23/gifts).



> A very special thank you to my lovely beta, jrayoh23. You Watson the shit out of everything I write. 
> 
>  
> 
> This is a collection of separate drabble stories that document the life and times of Moony, Padfoot, Wormtail and Prongs. 
> 
> There are times when these stories overlap. Some form a retelling of how Snape finds out that Remus has his 'furry little problem'. 
> 
> Some are about friendship. Most are about Remus and Sirius. 
> 
>  
> 
> Enjoy.

“What do you want me to do? I want to make it up to you.”

 

Remus looked at him stone faced. 

 

“Apologize to Snape.” 

 

Sirius’s mouth dropped open. 

 

It closed. 

 

It opened again. 

 

“No way. Why?”

 

“You know why. Because if James hadn't been there, your stunt would have gotten him killed.”

 

Sirius paced in a small circle; brain cells flickered, an inability to compute was obvious.

 

“No one knows what  _ would’ve _ happened. You can never know what would have happened if only one little thing had been different; that's just the nature of time.” 

 

“Okay,” Remus said, exasperated. “You greatly increased the odds that he would have gotten killed.”

 

_ But he didn’t get killed, so everything worked out!  _ Sirius thought. 

 

One look at Remus’s face told him that continuing down this road of argument was a mistake. He never thought that his friend would ask this of him though. He just couldn’t apologize to Snivellus...it would set a terrible precedent. Sirius altered his approach. 

 

“Please, Moony,” he begged softly, falling to his knees and looking up with pleading eyes. He held Remus’s thighs, his fingers curling against them. 

 

“I care about you, not Snape.”

 

He felt Remus still, saw his lips part ever so slightly. Sirius continued. 

 

The white tile of the hospital floor was cold and uncomfortable, but Sirius sank even lower against it. He nuzzled his cheek against Remus’s thigh, right up to the edge of his shorts. 

 

“Anything else. I’ll do anything else.”

 

Remus didn’t move, but Sirius could feel the muscles in his thighs thrumming under his fingers. 

 

He knew everything there was to know about Remus from years of careful study and a surplus of bizarre situations testing the boundaries of their friendship. Sirius knew that when Remus was nervous, he retracted into still, impassive silence. It was so artfully done that it could fool any layman into thinking that he was calm as a cloudless sky, but Sirius could always tell. 

 

With just the slightest pressure, Sirius urged his thighs apart and nestled closer. He mouthed Remus’s sack through the thin cotton, his eyes fluttering when he heard Remus’s breath hitch. 

 

Over time Sirius learned that Remus went through cycles around his transformation. In the days before, he was just a bit more aggressive. He liked when Sirius touched him more roughly, pushed him against walls and pulled his hair. He was more spontaneous, and these were the days when Sirius could get away things like with sliding Remus’s books and parchment off of his desk, or pulling him into an empty classroom. He wanted Sirius to fuck him harder, and to whisper terrible, dirty things while he was doing it. 

 

In the days after a transformation, Remus was much more subdued. He liked to be touched more tenderly; something Sirius had done even before he knew that was his preference, just as a precaution. Remus was more responsive to public displays of affection, like walking arm in arm or snogging in the common room. Sirius was much more likely to get away with slipping into Remus’s bed and getting to stay wrapped around him through the night. He wanted Sirius to fuck him in long, slow strokes, and tease him with hours of foreplay just for the sheer pleasure of it. 

 

Sirius continued to work his mouth languidly around Remus’s hardening cock, his saliva dampening the thin cotton. Remus was breathing shallow, and he wound his fingers into Sirius’s dark locks. 

 

Sirius was dying to pull his shorts away, to get a taste of something besides bland linen. He nudged his tongue under Remus’s sack, teasing the sensitive skin just behind. Remus groaned beautifully, sending another rush of blood to Sirius’s own cock. He imagined that he would only need to press a single finger against Remus’s chest to see him fall back like a domino, to give him all the access he wanted. 

 

“Let me do the thing that you like,” Sirius said, his voice low and earnest. 

 

Remus whimpered and rolled his hips against Sirius’s wanting mouth. He loved the way Remus smelled, more so when he started to sweat like he was. It made his mouth water for the the way Remus tasted, right down to his arsehole.  _ Especially _ his arsehole. 

 

“You like it too,” Remus whispered, clearly having lost his focus. 

 

Sirius peeked up at Remus’s face; his eyes were closed and his lips were red from being bitten. 

 

“God yes,” Sirius agreed. 

 

He took a hand off Remus’s thigh to open his own trousers and spread the leaking precum from the tip of his erection over the length of it. Sirius panted against Remus’s straining cock and hooked his fingers into the waist of those pale blue shorts. He was done teasing; he needed to be closer, flush against Remus, barely able to breath against him or buried inside him.  

 

Then Remus spoke with too much sadness in his voice for Sirius’s liking. 

 

“Please don’t torture me like this.”

 

It shook Sirius to hear his tone. It reminded him that they had been in the middle of an important discussion just minutes before.

 

“Please do what I ask,” Remus continued. “I can’t stand to think of you as someone who can’t say he’s sorry when someone could have died.”

 

After a brief moment of reflection, Sirius decided didn’t want to be that way either. 

 

Remus was better than him, so phenomenally out of his league that he counted himself lucky every day that Remus was inclined slum it with him. His blonde friend was physically beautiful, exceptionally funny and every bit as clever as a wizard twice his age. He came from a loving family who instilled in him a perfectly tuned moral compass and a fierce sense of loyalty...things that Sirius was starved of in his own home. Sirius had also witnessed Remus maneuver more chilling hardships in seventeen years than most people faced in their entire lives, and he watched Remus handle every moment with grace and unfathomable bravery. 

 

But the main thing that Sirius knew set Remus above him and the other sad savages who roamed the earth was that of all the pain, sadness and horror that Remus experienced, he never let any of it turn him off to the world or fill him with hate. Remus was  _ still _ overflowing with curiosity, daring and love, and Sirius was in awe of his utter inability to be broken. 

 

Sirius didn't just want to be someone who could choke down his pride on request...he wanted to be a tenth of the man worthy of having Remus on his arm.  

 

_ Remus deserves better friends.  _

 

The words Snape spat at him behind the castle echoed painfully in his mind. Sirius looked up into Remus’s earnest face. He could be better. 

 

“If it's really what you want, I'll apologize to Snape.”

 

At first, Remus looked surprised. But he lit up at the words, and the brightness in his eyes burned into Sirius. 

 

“Swear it,” Remus said. 

 

“I swear,” he repeated faithfully. 

 

Remus let out a breath and nodded as though a tremendous burden has been lifted from him. 

 

Sirius ran his hands up Remus’s sides until they rested on his jaw, drawing him down until their lips met. Remus sighed and rested his wrists on his shoulders, deepening the kiss. 

 

Sirius wondered how different he would be if Remus wasn't always coaxing the best out of him. His mind wandered away into the darkness of his own life and Bellatrix slipped into his thoughts. He felt the chill of her poise, her twisted mouth on his instead of Remus’s, drawing out his joy and his life like a gleeful dementor.

 

Bella was a psychopath, cold and unfeeling...a perfect Black. 

 

He willed her away and fixated on kissing his Remus. He felt warm skin and curled hair under his fingers, and he smiled as he tasted a trace of sugar and fig on his tongue. It wasn’t hard to get back to the present; he was always drawn to his beautiful blond companion a like a moth to a flame. 

 

Sirius did not forget that Remus’s mouth was welcoming despite part of his bottom lip being ragged and swollen. When Sirius angled his head enough that he could feel the plumpness with his tongue and taste the trace of blood, he slowed his pace and kissed Remus so gently that it already felt like a memory. 

 

Remus tangled his fingers into Sirius's hair and pushed his head down. A pulse of excitement reverberated in his groin at the forwardness of it. 

 

Sirius slipped off the blue shorts and pressed Remus back until he was laying on the bed. Remus lifted his shirt over his head, stretching out his torso so that every muscle was pulled tight and for a moment his ribs were plainly visible. Sirius allowed his eyes a few fleeting seconds to devour the sight. 

 

“You are just…” he paused, speechless. 

 

“...what?” Remus breathed, shifting his hips.

 

Sirius bit his lip and reached down to fondle his own cock. 

 

There was something paralyzing about having Remus completely naked in right front of him, as though time itself slowed for the sole purpose of paying reverence to the display. 

 

The intoxicating salty smell, the soft feel of Remus's skin and the jagged juxtaposition of his scars. 

 

The mild din of each panting breath he took, the way his eyes smoldered through his heavy black lashes. 

 

The creeping red blush that traveled down his chest to his cock. Every smell and sound and inch of flesh revealed was absolutely…

 

“Gorgeous.” 

 

Remus let his head drop against the mattress with a sigh and his fingers tightened in Sirius’s hair. 

 

In measured succession, Sirius pulled Remus’s hips forward until his arse was at the edge of the mattress, spread his thighs and looped Remus’s legs over his shoulders.  _ Finally _ , he spread Remus open and pressed his tongue to the crinkled skin he had been dying to taste. 

 

He started slow, savoring the soft groans he coaxed out and the faint tremors that shook Remus’s thighs. He teased the tight ring of muscle for as long he could hold down Remus’s bucking hips, or stand the painful grip on his hair. Sirius gradually transitioned from licking hot, lazy circles around Remus’s hole to pressing his tongue inside, applying enough pressure to make his shy, soft-spoken friend utter waves of profanity so obscene it would make a sailor blush. 

 

Sirius let one hand stray to his own needy erection, his heart pounding as he worked it in conjunction with his mouth. His other hand gravitated towards Remus’s entrance, his fingers dipping expertly inside while his friend thrashed beautifully below him. 

 

Sirius observed that just as Remus’s transformations affected his human form, something carried over from his time as an animagus as well. Since the moon wasn’t involved, he was free of unanticipated side-effects before he changed, but during the hours, and sometimes days that followed, he felt inexorably connected to his animal disposition. He yearned to smell, and touch and taste and get dirty and disheveled. Sirius flexed his bruised knuckles; he knew it was why he lost control and punched Snape instead of dueling him. 

 

But the primal congruence he felt never created new thoughts, it only increased the appeal of things he already wanted to do. Lapping at Remus’s most private, most sensitive spot, touching himself shamelessly while he did it, tearing moan after sweet moan from Remus’s straining throat; not in his wildest dreams could he think of a better way to spend his evening.

 

He worked his tongue up Remus’s sack, his lips glistening with warm saliva. The tension there was palpable. 

 

“Sirius, fuck me…”

 

Those three perfect words. 

 

He let them echo in his mind as he quickly shimmied his pants down his thighs and whispered the spells he learned to lubricate them both. 

 

Sirius could barely write four inches on Ancient Runes, but he was able to successfully execute seven wandless spells; six were exclusively for ameliorating sex, and one that was a relatively complicated healing spell that suppressed bleeding. Sirius could credit his entire repertoire of magical prowess to his friendship with Remus. Without him, Sirius’s knew there was a good chance that his cleverness would be wasted away at the bottom of a bottle, or worse, tinkering with the darker side of magic that his family was so fond of. 

 

_ Sirius, fuck me... _

 

He climbed hastily onto the bed, kicking his shoes and pants off haphazardly as he tangled his legs with Remus’s. The blonde tried to crawl backwards to place himself fully on the bed, simultaneously grasping at Sirius’s back to urge him up. Sirius heard his friends warm laughter bubbling up from under him, and he paused to nibble lovingly at Remus’s jaw. The blonde tilted his chin to the side, exposing his pale neck. 

 

Sirius shivered.

 

He knew it stemmed from when they had gleaming teeth, sharp as daggers and fashioned to bite through flesh, but it still had the impact of an incredibly intimate gesture. To present your neck, the softest stretch of skin protecting your pulse, was a deep expression of trust and vulnerability. It said;  _ Here...you can easily kill me, and I couldn't do anything to stop you.  _

 

There was only one acceptable response. Sirius pressed his lips to Remus’s fluttering jugular and mouthed innocent, sticky kisses down to his collarbone. 

 

_ I won't hurt you. You can trust me.  _

 

Remus moaned and smiled, urging Sirius further on top of him. 

 

The sheets bunched into a useless tangle beneath them as both boys maneuvered up the bed until they were fully on it, Sirius straddling Remus’s thigh. Heavy breaths passed between them as Remus pressed sure fingers into his sides and ground their hips together in a slow, rolling motion. 

 

His erection slid against Remus’s, the slick blond public hair both rough and soft against the smooth skin of his prick. Sirius clenched his jaw as their testicals rubbed together in the heat; if he wasn't careful he could cum just from grinding into Remus like this. Color rose in his cheeks at the very thought, the sweet simplicity of orgasming from dry humping like they did before they graduated to more advanced things. In the beginning, Remus had made him cum countless times without ever taking off his shorts, the heat from his novice hands and reckless gyrations pervading every layer of clothing between them as they snogged in the warm comfort of their beds. 

 

Sirius bit his lip. Rocking his hips against Remus set him on fire; it made the ache in his groin feel raw and urgent. He shifted to the left and settled into the bed, pushing Remus on his side and acclimating so that he lay curved behind him. 

 

Sirius had been careful to keep his weight off the tender places where bruises still colored his friends skin, and after some consideration decided that sideways was the best, most innocuous way to fuck him. From his vantage point he could see the tiny drops of sweat collecting in the fine hair of Remus’s neck, darkening the fine blond strands to honey brown. Sirius exhaled and bit softly into his shoulder. 

 

“How about this?” 

 

“Yes…” Remus breathed. “But hold on…”

 

He pulled Sirius’s arm though the gap between his shoulder and neck and kicked the twisted mess of sheets out from under them and onto the floor. 

 

“Better?”

 

“Better.”

 

Sirius aligned himself with Remus. 

 

Remus was slick and ready, but Sirius pushed his cock inside him with agonizing measure. Sweet, earnest begging dribbled from Remus’s lips and Sirius knew he was doing the right thing by starting off slow. 

 

As the heat enveloped him fully, every muscle in his body cramped with stress and then relaxed with pleasure. He dug his hand into his friend’s pale hip and found a fluent, unhurried rhythm that had sweat dotting his torso in seconds. It felt  _ so good _ to work hard for something, to do it so right, to feel the muscles in his torso and thighs burn with effort while his cock enjoyed the pleasure of it. 

 

Remus splayed his thighs further and Sirius couldn’t help but peer over his shoulder, groaning at the sight. His own face pressed against Remus’s flaming cheek, he hungrily watched his friend touch himself, stroking his own prick exactly the way he liked. Sirius felt strangely voyeuristic, like he was witnessing something private that even he wasn’t supposed to see. It was a sordid thrill and he indulged himself fully, feeling his cock twitch with gratification. 

 

Remus continued to plead with him to  _ please don’t stop _ , and  _ tell me that you love this,  _ and Sirius closed his eyes and answered each appeal devoutly. 

 

_ I can’t stop…I love fucking you…I fucking love you… _

 

Sirius flushed.

 

A small gasp escaped Remus and Sirius knew that he had heard him, but he was helpless to stop. 

 

Sirius’s heart beat out of his chest as he kept up his steady cadence, sweat drenched and pressed against Remus, his lips right next to his friend’s ear, openly panting, mindlessly speaking, ardently praying that this was okay, because it wasn’t like it was with his other friends or his bat-shit crazy family, he could tell Remus anything, he didn’t need to downplay or hide his affection. It wasn’t wrong to have feelings or say them out loud...or to be in love. 

 

“Say it again,” Remus told him, his voice hoarse, but unmistakable.

 

Everything inside Sirius burst into sweet, blessed flames, and he could barely breath, but he told Remus he would do anything he asked and he meant it.

 

“I fucking love you, you're gorgeous and you feel amazing, and I’m fucking in love with you.”

 

The words tumbled out of him like it was the most natural task he had ever set to, like his mouth had only truly been made with the express purpose of one day uttering those words to Remus. 

 

Sirius put his hand over Remus’s, eagerly taking over its task. He worked the velvety length of his friend’s prick as he fucked him desperately, unable to hold anything back. 

 

Remus shuddered and pressed back against him in wanton supplication, grasping fruitlessly at the bare hospital bed and straining impossibly. A string of choked, inaudible whispers escaped his lips, and the next time Sirius’s fingers ran over the head of Remus’s cock, they dragged hot cum down with them.

 

Watching, hearing, feeling Remus lose his mind sent Sirius into a spiral he couldn’t control. Sweet surrender surged through him and pressed his forehead into the nape of Remus’s neck, his bottom lip caught in his teeth. 

 

For a moment, the dark, lovely pleasure of it strangled his breathing and blackened his sight, and then moving inside Remus was effortless, easy with the slickness from his release. 

 

“Sweet Glynnis, you are amazing,” Sirius rasped, nuzzling Remus’s neck and blinking the light back in. He let his soft cock slip out of Remus, but pressed right back against him, flinging an arm over his chest. Sirius allowed himself a moment of comfortable darkness, knowing he would soon have to answer for what he had said. 

 

But Remus writhed away and turned under his arm, shifting until he faced Sirius. He was so close that Sirius noticed for the first time that the purple bloom at the crest of his friend’s cheek had a smear of yellow around it. The angle of the light made Remus’s eyes uncharacteristically dark, and the shadow of his lashes were visible on his pale cheeks. 

 

Remus’s mouth started to move, but the sound that came out was uncommonly quiet. 

 

“You’re not fucking me now, so if you meant what you said...tell me again.” 

 

Sirius’s eyes widened and his lips parted. It was nearly too much to say it again in the quiet space between them, right to Remus’s face. 

 

Physically and emotionally exerted, Sirius easily drowned in the silence, dragged into the depths of his dark, swirling thoughts. His mind raced and his eyes glazed over as he stared down decades of frowning ancestors from the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black. At first it made him feel small...but the awful inbred sneers and bigoted glares clear on the faces of his deranged relatives started to make him angry...defiant. He remembered when he had taken Remus’s hand on the first day of school, the moment when he had been sorted into Gryffindor, and the first time he pushed his father back and spent the rest of the summer with the Potters. 

 

Sirius closed his eyes and mustered his courage. It was a deep expression of trust and vulnerability to expose your heart without even a thin stretch of skin protecting it, to trust that it wouldn’t be ripped right out of your chest. 

 

_ Here...you can kill me and I couldn't do anything to stop you.  _

 

“I love you,” Sirius whispered. 

 

Remus propped himself up on one elbow and looked him over.

 

He didn’t mean to stop breathing, but Sirius felt like it was just another thing that was out of his control. He never expected Remus to say it back, he told himself. He was a fuck up, he was just lucky that Remus was fond of him anyway and didn't sleep with anyone else. That was fine, he could go on like that, torn open, half alive, he could find a way...

 

Remus placed a single, wet kiss under his jaw.  _ I won’t hurt you. You can trust me.  _

 

“I love you too.” 

 


End file.
